In a spaceship, lost in the depths of the meteor belt, is a very troubled princess, and an equally troubled cat. This was peculiar within itself, and gave rise to several questions in both the princess and the cat. A shared question, to be revisited later, was this: how did they get on the spaceship, and where were they going? Apart from this initial joint question, however, the individual problems plaguing the princess and the cat were very different.

 Firstly, the cat seemed to be having an out-of-body experience. He clutched at his fur, despairingly at his tail, drawing a paw over his ears, a glazed, disbelieving look on his face.

 “Fucking hell, I’m a cat…”

 The princess—Princess Nonsense—was concerned with a more unsettling issue.

 “There is something extremely odd here,” the princess, just a girl, really, was saying to the pet cat.

 “I’m not her pet!” the cat, Cosmo Kitty, cried indignantly. “I’m not a pet at all! I am, in fact–”

 “I’m not sure when I realized this, but yes, the more I think about it, the more it’s clear to me,” Princess Nonsense mused. “I wonder if it’s just me, or if you too, have awareness of the narrative.”

 She turned to face him. “Brother, do you have awareness of the narrative? Do you understand that someone is writing us right now?”

 Cosmo Kitty was clearly not paying attention.

 “A cat,” he repeated despondently.

 “Pipe down, Brother,” the princess hushed. She needed him to snap out of his feline shock and realize the truth of the situation that they had been thrust into. “I want you to think about what could possibly be wrong. What’s abnormal here? Use your brain.”

 “This is terrible! Who cursed me?” He caterwauled loudly. “I’m a cat for Christ’s sake, that’s the abnormal part! What could possibly be more pressing or unsettling? Is there literally anything else?”

 Cosmo Kitty ran his claws down the sides of his head once more, to ensure that this wasn’t some bizzaro dream. The world certainly was taking on some dreamlike atmosphere, in fact, he felt quite lightheaded…

 He sat down. His sister had an odd expression on her face. Her thick, glossy eyebrows were furled together and downwards, an impatient frown pulling at the corners of her lips. It was as if she was waiting for him to realize something.

 Well, she was right, this whole situation was clearly abnormal. For his whole life, he inhabited the form of a handsome human prince. Cosmo Kitty was chosen to advise Princess Nonsense in her rule of Lalande 21185, their home star, a position of high importance. Now, he felt like he was living some sort of sick joke. The transformation had preserved the original colouring of his hair, and from what he could see of himself, he was now a very fluffy cream-furred cat. There was something odd about the fact that he could not remember why he was now a cat, and when the transformation had happened. The memory of the event wasn’t even fuzzy in his brain, it was non-existent. He tried to think back as far as he could and the events became weirder as well.

 The last thing that he could remember pre-spaceship was that he was on a neighbouring planet, running through a crucial meeting with the Lalandian representatives negotiating the final terms of human-Lalandian co-settlement on planet Gliese 411-d. It had just been rendered habitable, and he was in the final stretch of negotiations to ensure an equal split, lest a border dispute turn into a war between the two species. He was talking through the resource division proposals… and then?

 When Cosmo Kitty “awoke” on the ship, it wasn’t an immediate awakening. He wasn’t simply unconscious, then suddenly conscious, as if waking up from a sleep. Instead, it was more gradual… like a crescendo. Yes, that was the correct analogy.

 Alright, it was like this. One could imagine a violin bow drawn over a string, playing a note into existence very slowly. There would be no discernable point in time where the note had “begun”; it’d be a fade-in to existence. Cosmo Kitty’s awakening on the ship was like that. There was not a single point in time where he could pinpoint - ah, he was conscious! At first, he had milled on the ship in a passive state, merely looking around and blinking, breathing. As time went on, he grew more and more aware of his environment, and his eyes became less glazed as his consciousness nodded back into existence. His expressions grew from passive, to confused, to urgent, and eventually, dialogue began.

 When he stretched his memories back to the Gliese 411-d meeting, he recalled the same fading sensation, but this time, with an opposite, decrescendoing effect. In his memories, his sensations became more and more muted and his consciousness had grown dimmer and dimmer, and then, nothing. The jump between the meeting and his time on the spaceship was not a jump at all, moreso a transition between two sections of music.

 Cosmo Kitty was about to relay this all to his sister so they could discuss what was happening and what to do, but before he opened his mouth, he realized—

 Wait!

 Cosmo Kitty?

 That wasn’t his name, even though it had been repeatedly used in the narration. Well, it wasn’t the name he was assigned to by his parents at birth, and it certainly wasn’t the name that he was using any moment before the spaceship. What kind of name was Cosmo Kitty for a prince, anyways? He remembered his real name, that wasn’t the issue. The problem he was having was, why was the author bent on calling him Cosmo Kitty?

 WAIT.

 Author??

 The realization struck him heavily, and all at once. What was his sister saying before? Something about how…

 “Someone is writing us!”

 A great panic overcame him, an unexplainable terror. A primordial fear, fueled by the instinct that this statement was undeniably true.

 “There it is,” Princess Nonsense sighed, kicking her feet back in relief. She plopped herself down on a nearby bean bag chair, dark magenta hair tumbling down her shoulders. “I was hoping you’d have this feeling as well.”

 The ship’s engines hummed dutifully in the background, as brother and sister sat with this idea, digesting their new circumstance. Cosmo Kitty buried his head in his paws (shit, the narration was saying paws) and he grasped for the voice of reason he was trained to summon in times of unexpected emergency.

 In contrast, a giddy smile was spreading on Princess Nonsense’s face.

 “What about every other possible explanation?” he said desperately.

 This concept felt so abstract, absurd, and especially silly to him that he was reluctant to accept it immediately. He was no scientist, but maybe this was the doing of a very advanced piece of technology he had no awareness of.

 “Maybe we’ve both been cursed by something, and it’s making us think the same strange thoughts. Maybe it’s by the same being that turned me into a cat,” he suggested.

 He sheathed and unsheathed his new claws, marvelling at the sensation.

 “Which, I’m a cat now by the way, can we return to this for a second? Is this not, like, crazy to you that I’m a cat now?”

 Princess Nonsense looked a little put out by this suggestion. “Yeah, you as a cat is pretty freaky,” she agreed. “I guess it could be the product of a science-sorcerer’s curse.”

 She paused to think.

 “No… but I think there are more interesting and plausible conclusions to come to here. Besides, when have you ever heard of a device that can transfigure people into animals? That’s a huge breakthrough in magi-science, even at this state, and I doubt it would have happened without our knowledge.”

 She waved a hand impatiently.

 “Okay, okay, we can brainstorm alternatives later, but let’s just assume that there is an author. Doesn’t it seem like the best possible explanation for the fact that we both have a newfound instinct that there is an author? Plus, Occam's razor.”

 He felt annoyed at this baseless citation of Occam’s razor, but she hurried on.

 “Say this is true. For whatever reason, the author now decided to give us awareness of our situation. Don’t you see? This changes everything! All my life I’ve wondered about God or some higher deity, the reason behind our creation.”

 “Assume our newfound instincts are correct. Just assume–and when you do assume this, we know! We know about God! Who isn’t a God, she’s an author!”

 The princess fidgeted her feet excitedly. “And now that we’ve been given a sign that she exists, and who she might be, we can work with that! If we think hard enough, we can harness her somehow to accomplish a lot of important things.”

 Cosmo Kitty started to feel a little dizzy.

 “Prinny,” he said, calling her by a childhood nickname. “I wonder if you've lost your marbles.”

 “It makes complete sense,” said Princess Nonsense.

 “Just think brother! There are a lot of things we can do with this idea. If we figure out more about the author, maybe we can get her to write our lives in the way we want her to. I bet we could change you back into a human this way! Perhaps that’s the first challenge she’s lined up for us!”

 An author in the place of God. Not only did this go against everything he chose to believe, it would mean big things for the way people lived their lives.

 Unfortunately everything his sister was saying was clicking together in his brain, in a strange way. He turned it over in his mind, that intuition that was so profoundly imbued into him, it felt like knowledge. He knew for a fact that he was indeed a character, and there was indeed an author. It felt as sure to him as the fact that he was breathing. That concept of a higher deity was extremely exciting.

 The main thing that he was having trouble with was that this situation was so bizarre, his mind was performing somersaults in his head trying to line everything up together.

 His sister was proposing that they, what, try to use the author? Outsmart her to get things done, such as possibly turning him back into a human? Cosmo Kitty shook his head, feeling slow and sluggish.

 “How do you suggest we take control over this situation? The hypothetical author decides. She,” he flicked his tail vaguely at everything around them, “has control over her characters.”

 “Yes. But how much influence does an author have over her characters? Any good author is bound to the personalities she chooses to give her characters.” Princess Nonsense had a dreamy expression on her face. Always the schemer, always excited to play the game.

 “She obviously wants me to do something about it, or else I wouldn’t have the motivation to do so, right?” the princess was saying. “She’s the one who writes my motivations after all.”

 Cosmo Kitty stood up again, felt another wave of dizziness, and put his head in between his legs, nose pointed between his paws. He breathed in. And out.

 “So this is where my legacy begins,” Princess Nonsense mulled. “On some stupid kid’s personal website. That’s almost a little depressing for me, don’t you think?”

 “Hey,” Cosmo Kitty said in between breaths, mind whirling. “At least you’re human. You’ve got autonomy. I got royally screwed over for what, the plot? I suppose it’s funny or something, that I’m a cat? I don’t find this the least bit funny at all. Fuck.”

 Princess Nonsense shook her head, forlorn. “Don’t you see? If I’m just a character in a story, I’ve got as much autonomy as you do. Which is, zilch.”

 There was a moment of heavy silence.

 “I feel like we jumped a couple of steps,” Cosmo Kitty said slowly, trying to come back to his senses. “Hypothetically, say we aren’t actually ‘characters’ in a ‘story’.”

 “I assume both of us have the same sense that insists that we are.”

 “And what is that sense, exactly?”

 “Deep, unshakeable intuition that we have knowledge of the fourth wall. And more than that—knowledge of the specifics. Look, there are a lot of little details that we can sus out here. We both said ‘written,’ which means that we aren’t characters in a strictly oral or visual story.”

 Cosmo Kitty stared at her, dumbfounded.

 “I said, ‘some stupid kid’s personal website’. This means that the author is young, has self-deprecating humor, and is presumably personally motivated to write this story. Although we can’t rule anything out.”

 She looked at him. “See what I mean? Help me out. What other specifics do you feel?”

 “Um, I guess she decided to give us awareness of our situation,” Cosmo Kitty offered faintly. “Although we both already know this.”

 “No, that’s important,” Princess Nonsense nodded. “Understanding the motives of the author is highly relevant.”

 “Oh, and,” he felt the skin beneath his fur heat up. “We keep saying she. I guess the author is female then? I don’t know how we know that. This is super weird.”

 Princess Nonsense twitched her fingers. “I wish I could note this all down somewhere.”

 Cosmo Kitty took a breath. As the princess’ first-in-command, she relied on him for advice, so he would maintain a level head.

 “Prinny, I agree that the implications of a confirmed creator are really insane. I wonder if any others are aware of this as well…?” He trailed off, distracted by this thought.

 No, refocus. The idea of a godlike author was an enticing idea, and he would like to think about its implications, except for the fact that his primary concern was Lalande. He needed to know how the border negotiations went through, and he needed to return the princess to Sard Tower, headquarters of Lalande, as soon as possible so she could continue in her governance. He tried to steer the conversation back on track.

 “How about this though: we head home to Lalande first. Need I remind you of the extremely crucial border negotiations that are taking place right now?”

 Princess Nonsense gave a slow nod. “You’re right. With everything that’s been going on in the past hour, that’s been on the back of my mind. I forgot to ask you how that concluded.”

 Good, rationality was returning to her. He felt a wave of relief wash over him. Real-world concerns, he could deal with.

 He shook his head. “It didn’t. Or if we did come to a conclusion, I don’t remember what happened. My memories fade in the middle of the meeting, and reappear on this ship.”

 “That’s not good,” Princess Nonsense sighed. “Well, I agree, let’s head back. When we get there, we can consult the head Research Sorcerer of Sard Academy and anyone else who might have expertise over this domain. Then we can establish this situation with the author.”

 Cosmo Kitty extended a paw, and Princess Nonsense shook it.

 “And find a way to turn me back human,” he added, as an important afterthought.

 He briefly wondered about the author. Could the author ‘hear’ his thoughts right now? How much agency did she have over them?

 “I’ll drive,” he said, heading towards the controls of the ship. He couldn’t focus his mind on his abstract things right now. He needed to deal with something tangible, like getting home.

 Staring at the array of buttons and controls, he felt a calm sense of familiarity. This was his domain. He instinctively stretched a paw towards the controls, and then stopped, frowning at the Primary Flight Display screen.

 “Hey… where are we right now, anyway?”

 The princess hopped up from her beanbag, and peered at the screen. “I’m not sure. This isn’t a route I’ve been on before.”

 Cosmo Kitty groaned. “Great.”

 “Not to worry, Brother,” Princess Nonsense winked. “You may be the flight expert here, but I’m primed in navigation. I’ll figure out where we are.”

 “Perhaps we should explore the ship first though,” she pondered. “Figure out if this is one of Lalande’s ships, and how much food and fuel we have. Why don’t you do that, and I’ll see if I can centre in on our location?”

 “That’s sensible,” he agreed. He glanced around, taking full stock of the cockpit where they had ‘spawned’. There was an open hatch at the end of the room, and he could see the tips of ladder rungs inviting him to explore below.

 Well, he’d bite. Princess Nonsense began rummaging around the compartments near the controls - looking for a map or a guidebook of some sort, he presumed.

 What a weird situation, Cosmo Kitty thought again.

 As he headed towards the opening, he thought to himself, if there was an author who put them on this ship, he hoped she had a good reason for doing so. Maybe in some way, this side adventure and being pulled out of Lalande would turn out to be meaningful. An author wouldn’t write a story without weight or meaning, would they?

 Trying to banish the thoughts from his brain, he plunged into the opening of the mysterious hatch in the floor, descending once more into an unknown, the belly of the spaceship.

 When they got back to Lalande, he seriously needed to sit and think over the potential existence of the author. He needed to engage with this in good faith, even though he seriously hated this whole situation.

 And if she does exist, he thought, a little chill running over his spine, I pray to God that she’s on our side.